A Diamond in the Rough

I am a pain in the ass to shop with.

First, I'm thrifty. Even when I got paid a rather decent amount of money, I have a really, really hard time spending money on most things (as I've written about before, so I won't go into it much here). But I noticed yesterday that I tend to like something, look at the price, and then decide that something is wrong with it or it isn't worth the listed amount and put it back.

Second, there's a lot of stuff I don't like/can't wear. I don't like small floral prints, animal prints, ruffles, bows, things that tie, jazzy MC Escher looking prints, (most prints, actually, though I do like large florals, stripes, and some polka dots) or colors like olive green, beige and lavender. That's good, because I can't wear those colors, just like I can't wear any other shade of green, all yellows, pure white, or cool-toned purples and blues. I tend to shy away from red because I feel that it brings out the I-just-came-in-from-the-cold red nose I seem to have at all times. I also can't wear a lot of necklines or cuts on top because my barely-A cup size makes it impossible. I don't like blue with denim or purple with black. (And I own a lot of denim and black--who doesn't?)

Third, I have a hard time finding things that fit. Now, I realize this could be a problem compounded by the above money issues and large number of things that I dismiss out of the gate. Shirts are usually too big, even the XS, and end up making me look like a box with no shape. I know that a belt is a girl's best friend, but enough already. The only jeans that seem to fit are from the Levi's "Curve ID" line, because otherwise they gap in the waist if they fit in the thigh or look painted on if they fit in the waist. Dresses are hard, because my top and bottom aren't exactly the same size, and I don't have the wherewithal (or money) to hunt down a tailor right now. I don't really do the blazer/jacket look anyway, but jackets tend to pull across the shoulders or jab me in the armpits. Because I'm so small and petite (yeah, yeah, an obnoxious problem to have), I get lost in things that have a lot of fabric. I am also very sensitive to changes in temperature (thanks, thyroid!), so I'm usually either freezing or sweating in my clothes.

So I have a hard time finding things that I love. Off hand, I can think of maybe ten things I currently own that I absolutely adore: a grey one-shoulder dress, my straight leg jeans, a sleeveless white ruffled shirt (ok, I know I said I can't wear pure white, but I always wear a necklace), and black pencil skirt come to mind, along with three pairs of shoes. I have a fashion magazine addiction, admittedly, but I'm not ever going to be a slave to trends and find most of them ridiculous, anyway; but, like, am I really supposed to get excited about tees and cardigans? I see things on other people and try to emulate their look to no avail, or see cute things and either have them be too expensive or ill-fitting. Since I can't walk around naked, I end up just making do and hope that I at least don't have to spend too much in the process.

Which is why I am beyond excited to have found a new store.

My friend Kate told me about this place called MJR Sales. It's a warehouse for the parent company that owns Victoria's Secret, The Limited, Lane Bryant, and some other brand I've never heard of. It's a little hard to get to, since it's tucked in the back of a corporate park that involves driving through no fewer than two round-a-bouts, but worth it. It's very bare bones--cement flooring, industrial lights, no salespeople to help, and dressing rooms that have curtains instead of doors. Outlets tend to have past-seasons goods, or the factory versions of the current styles, and this place does, too, though with a larger selection and fewer guarantees. I found a wool skirt I would have killed for, and the only sizes they had were 8 and 14. I tried on a great embellished tank I liked, but all three XS had damage of some kind. As the one saleslady remarked to me when I told her it was my first time there, "you have to kiss a lot of frogs." Pucker up.

But there are far more upsides, at least for me. First, the prices are Too Die For. I didn't see one thing over $20 except the wool winter coats. Second, the main part is organized first by item--pants, skirts, short sleeve tops, long sleeve/sweaters, dresses--then by size, then by color. So for green/yellow/cool-toned challenged me, I can just skip that entire portion of the rack. You're only allowed 6 items in the dressing "room" at a time, but they have a nifty system set up so you can switch stuff out without having to travel. I tend to dislike unctuous salespeople, so their absence is actually pleasant. In addition, they have shoes, bags, accessories, jewelry and undergarments/lingerie from Vicki's. (They also have clothes from Vicki's, like in the catalog but that generally isn't available in their stores.) If you're handy with a sewing needle, the damages rack will also be fantastic; I'm not, but some of the things had such negligible problems--a teeny, tiny hole in the back--that it wouldn't bother me anyway, just like the surface gash at the back of my old refrigerator purchased at the scratch-and-dent appliance store.

I came home with two dresses, two sweaters, tights and earrings for $58. The one sweater was originally priced $60 itself! It's the perfect kind of place to stock up on basics; I'm not spending a ton of money on cotton tees, plain cardigans, or simple silver jewelry. I tried on a whole bunch of stuff that didn't work, of course, but that's going to happen anywhere, and I was smart enough to wear an easy on/off outfit and sandals (and ate a good snack prior to departure). I was bummed about that one skirt and the pair of Anne Klein peep-toe slingback heels that fit but had one broken strap, but I really like what I walked away with.

Much to my mother's chagrin, everything ended up being grey or black, but, like, one thing at a time.